Updated: Oct 30, 2020
Everything you ever wanted to know about grief and loss
So many questions come up about grief from my clients and on social media. These are just some common ones which comes up time and time again.
Can grief make you tired?
Absolutely, without a shadow of a doubt!
In the beginning stages of grief, you don't really know what is going on. There is no real capacity in the human mind to conceive that where there was once someone you knew - living, breathing, full of energy and 'real' - there is now nothing. An empty space exists.
That's a lot for us to process. Our bodies and minds are full of emotions and they can drain all of our energy.
During my own phases of grief, my mind shut me down completely. I laid on the sofa for days, not doing or thinking anything. Not knowing what was going on.
And that was just fine. It was my way of my body and mind protecting me.
The important thing is to accept what is happening to you and trust that your mind and body are protecting you in the right way. And if you have the feeling they aren't, seek help. Seek a friend and talk it out. Call a help line.
Can grief kill you?
You'd be surprised how often I get asked this question.
There are of course stories of people dying of a broken heart.
Whether you could say that grief had killed them, you could never really say.
Grief can certainly cause you to do irrational things. It can so deeply traumatise you that you stop eating, or don't make clear-headed decisions. You might even hit the bottle as a coping mechanism.
So in those terms, of course it can.
But consider this! You were put on this earth as a lone human being. Hopefully born of love and your presence here is a miracle in itself.
If we are lucky enough to meet our soul-mate in life and fall in love for ever, that too is a wonderful thing.
But your time here is for you. You are here to do good for everyone and to flourish in life fore the greater good.
So grieve as you need, but if you can't move past that grief, you should seek help.
Can grief make you sick?
If it didn't I wouldn't have seen all the clients I have over the past 5 years.
Almost all of my clients have experienced physical and mental illness caused by un-handled grief and trauma. Those illnesses have ranged from IBS and digestive issues, to infertility to Lyme disease to joint and tendon issues.
By addressing the grief and trauma, when ever it began, their present day illnesses have been helped.
They've been able to let go of the past.
They been able to move into joy and gratitude.
They've been able to manifest the lives they have dreamt of.
You may not however, even know that it's grief that has made you sick. But think of it like this. If you push down, swallow and ignore an emotion which was screaming at you to be processed and dealt with, it's going to pop out somewhere else one day and usually with increased strength.
Deal with it sooner rather than later!
Want to supercharge your way to a joyful life, full of gratitude
and free from shame, blame and guilt?